A Glutton for Punishment

Disclaimer: This is a rant. Probably more suitable for a personal diary entry. However, in the small case someone is able to benefit from knowing they are not alone in how they feel, I have decided to post anyways. If you can’t relate, more power to you my friend and please help a sister out.

Why is it that all these experiences I was once so excited to take on are taking such a huge toll on me? I know I’m not the only one but quite frankly I’m feeling like the minority as far as my adulting is concerned. I can’t believe that I honestly thought as a kid that life would be so much easier when…(feel free to fill in your own blank).

Well, I’ve got news for you (for myself really). Life is not going to be easier when…(insert event).

Life just keeps adding different problems. Get one thing figured out?? Great! Here’s a new problem to tackle. Think that making a decision would help make your life better/easier?? Wrong! Life just got that much more challenging. Here’s some more responsibility for you!

And I can’t dare say how I really feel when I’m out and in the presence of company. Who wants to hang out with a Debbie Downer?

“How are you Jasmine?” “Great! Same old same old. How about you?”

I shall not even begin to voice the annoyances, frustrations and stresses of the day.

And quite frankly it’s my own fault. Once I start heading down pessimism trail it takes me a while to find my back to the light. Which is why I’m writing this. I needed to air it out. (I sincerely thank you for your listening eyes and ears).

I needed to put out there that being a mother, being a wife, being an employee, being a dog mom, being a homeowner, being a woman, attempting to be an entrepreneur, being a Christ follower, being a friend, being a daughter…it’s all EXHAUSTING. And yet in the same breath I can’t not mention what a blessing it all is as well. All those same things are what I’m most grateful for. How can that be the case?

How can all of my frustrations and stresses stem from what I love most and hold dear?? It’s my bedtime so I’m not going to take this time to figure it out. If you happen to have the answer, I am all ears. Really. Let me know.

Until next time (maybe I’ll have some answers then).

A sleepy momma,

Jasmine B.

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